Waiting In Vain

Having finished my mission* papers over two months ago now, everyday that my Bishop and Stake President decide to be busy enough to not send my papers into ‘Mission Headquarters’ brings more temptation in the form of dream trips to Europe, Australia, and back to Hawaii.  It’s been over 60 days since I finished the requirements I was supposed to and in those 60 days, apparently there wasn’t enough time to submit my papers in.  If we’re working in probabilities, that means the chances of me serving a mission so far are 0/60(shut up, I know that’s not how probability works).  So I have a 0% chance to serve a mission… so far.

One of my best friends has recently began his attempts in becoming an LDS missionary as well.  Part of the process is to first fill out all of your personal information online.  Brace-face(the friend), brought to my attention one day, a picture on the log-in page of the LDS missionary recommendation website.  Here is the picture:

Notice anything?

I would never really say this to a church leader, but seriously, man.  WHAT DA EFF?!?!?!  While I’m stuck here on 60 days, my Bishop is raking in the benefits from this photo which thousands of people have now seen.  I’ve sat by for 60 days too long and now, I want mine.  It seems as though my chances have changed.  What do I want?  Compensation.  I don’t even want money anymore.  Just give me my mission call and we’ll call it even.  If they don’t give me my call soon, I will be forced to press charges.  They’re using MY image without my permission and it’s time they paid up.  However, if this series of events should occur, the chances of me getting a mission call soon are still at 0%, possibly even lower.  Please help a desperate man’s attempt to serve.  ‘It’s been…’ 60 days ‘…since I’ve been knocking on your door.  And I still can knock summore’.  Tomorrow is day 61.  It will mos def be filled with another day of dream images of my future(maybe VERY near future if things keep up the way they are) trip to Europe.  But it IS day 61, and I like the odds of 0/61.


*LDS Mission for those unaccustomed to mormon terminology.  I’m pretty sure very few people read this blog anyway and that the people who do read it ARE, in fact, mormon.  So this is really all for nothing.  Kudos to the four people who will read this.  YOU are the future of our society.


~ by tenaciouskamalei on August 11, 2008.

6 Responses to “Waiting In Vain”

  1. Maybe this picture on the website IS your mission. If so–wow. That’s a really easy mission. Keep us posted.

  2. KAMALEI this is so funny

  3. Hilariously uncanny. I would demand royalties, man. I would start taking two or three pieces of sacrament bread until you get some compensation if I were you.

  4. Holy Moly

  5. ha, 5 people

  6. […] Have a good two years Kamalei. […]

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